Surprise!!

Just about everyone who knows me knows that I love surprises. I create little ways to surprise myself each day.

I don't know when exactly I became aware of this fact.

I know that I didn't, unlike my sister, sneak into wrapped gifts. I know that when people told me they had a surprise for me I wouldn't beg to know what it was.

The best I can pinpoint it is to 1998. That's the year I got one of my best surprises~my sweet boy Kaleb. Kaleb Dylan. He is the answer to so many of my prayers.
When I found out I was pregnant I with him I was certainly not in an ideal situation.

I wasn't married. I didn't have a career. I had no goals and I certainly didn't know how to be a mom.

Over the years I have accomplished most of those things. I'm still working on what I want to be when I grow up but at least now I have a career in mind :)

Kaleb is a special boy.
He is amazingly smart-sometimes too smart for his own good!

He is becoming a master at sarcasm.

He has the sweetest heart.

He is an awesome cook.

He still holds my hand when we walk places and isn't embarrassed about it.

He adores his grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins.

He loves animals almost as much as I do.

At ten years old he still thinks I'm pretty cool.
He has always been incredibly observant.

He is kind and courteous.

I love when he sneaks into my bed at night and searches for my hand first thing. Then he doesn't let go all night no matter how much we shift.

He has a gift on the football field.

He makes me laugh constantly-It's saved his little behind numerous times!

He is learning to be a gentleman.

He loves hanging out with his friends.

His hands are magic on my neck after a stressful day.

He's more than I would have ever dreamt I deserve.

A few of my favorite Kaleb moments over the last few years...

Kaleb and Bella at the Boise Zoo

First year of Babe Ruth baseball

First year of flag football

One of my all time favorite photos of Kaleb

Elvis Halloween 2007...

He's a huge Elvis fan!

Florida November 2007

Kaleb and Lucy

Strikin' a pose!

Oregon Coast March 2008

Kaleb and cousin Blake in Alaska July 2008

Kaleb and Christian

:)

I Can't Believe I'm Saying This...

...but I think I'm homesick.

I left Pendleton almost 5 years ago and haven't looked back.

I left behind judgement, questions, familiarity, family, criticism and friends.

After a bit of settling in Idaho I found....Me.

When you grow up in a small town unintentional labels are put on you. Some deserved and fitting. Some not.

I was always the sister of so-and-so, the friend of so-and-so, the girl who did such-and-such and didn't do this-and-that. I never had a chance to show who or what I really was. This isn't so much the fault of a small town. I accept my role in the labeling. But when people make assumptions it's hard to break that barrier. Even as recently as a month ago I was spoken about as the girl I used to be. The girl I really really wanted to be forgotten.

I'm not sure why I'm home sick now. Maybe because I am finally happy with me. Maybe because my nephew and nieces are growing faster than I can keep up with. Maybe because a few special people have chosen to forget that other girl. Maybe because I think somebody there may need me for once.

Whatever the reason, it's here. I'm officially homesick and I can't wait to make a visit next month!

Here are a few possible reasons for my new illness:

Bella, Kaleb and Gaga at the Green Bridge

My nephew Blake and Kaleb

Acres and acres of hills to explore

At my brother's place with the beautiful Blue Mountains in the back

My brother Daryl and sister in law Nicole

View from Cabbage Hill

Bella and I taking a break

Bella, Kaleb and Bapa

Bella, my niece Tanna and Kaleb

The Blues

Kaleb and his Uncle Daryl having guy time

My niece Charlie Mae and sister Donna